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Nedelja, 31. VII 2011.

Logo Leteći bumbar #385 

U ovom broju donosimo:

2. Širom neta

            Vesti sa četova i foruma

2. Moja hobotnica

            Obrada pesme "Moja domovina"

3. McDonalds prijava            Engleski jezik

            Stvarna prijava za posao

4. Špigl - dvojnici poznatih

            Foto-feljton: dvojnici poznatih ličnosti.

5. Kako sam upoznao ljubav svog života

            FB romantična priča

6. Locirajte se!                       Engleski jezik

            Vi mora da ste iz… ako je većina ovih tvrdnji tačna (Nova Engleska, Njujork; 3501-3546)

8. Klub 27

            Klub poznatih

Sačuvajte ovaj broj! Možete od njega da napravite:

- molersku kapu

- brodić

- avion koji leti…

Urednicima ostalih časopisa: Budite fer i ostavite link za ovaj časopis kad već uzimate materijal odavde!

Ajron men

Širom neta

Slovo Pre svega, zbog godišnjeg odmora, odlučili smo da umesto dvobroja (kako smo obično radili) da ovaj broj objavimo sa nedelju dana zakašnjenja. Takođe smo odlučili tako i ubuduće radimo, umesto da pravimo dvobroj. Svakako, obavestićemo naše čitaoce u prethodnom broju. Ako ne – dobićete dvobroj.

            Pored toga, naša rubrika "Širom neta" je malo živnula (u smislu "matičarskog ureda", što je i osnovna delatnost našeg časopisa). U toku prethodne dve nedelje sklopljen je jedan brak i rodile su se dve devojčice.

ť            9. VII udala se Jelenčica. Redakcija čestita mladencima i želi im puno sreće u zajedničkom životu!

ť           17. VII Gambit je dobio ćerkicu. Čestitamo na prinovi.

ť            Istog dana 17. VII je Mis JR dobila ćerkicu. I njoj srdačno čestitamo.
Sonik i Emi Rouz

            Kako smo samo sa jednim od gorenavedenih stupili u kontakt zbog ove rubrike (sa ostalima nismo stigli), objavili smo samo kratke informacije.

MOJA HOBOTNICA

            Izvodi zbor Bivšeg i Sadašnjeg HDZ

            Tekst napisao: S. Mareković

 

            (D. Palančec)

Svakog dana mislim na tebe

Crtam recke, brojim godine

Figa je u srcima

A lova nestala

Ima tu i više istina...

 

            (J. Kosor)

Svaka šuša laže za tebe

Pos'o cveta, lova putuje

 

            (I. Šuker)

Tisuću dionica noćas propada

Cijeli Dorh je sada za nama

Za namaaaa
Brokula
Roditeljski sastanak

            (refren – cijeli HDZ)

Moja Hobotnica

Moja Hobotnica

Ima snagu moćnog Ive (solo Milinović)

Afere rastu k'o gljive (solo Hebrang)

Moja zemlja Hrvatska

 

            (I. Sanader)

Vratit ću se moram doći

Tu je moj dom

Moje guske, moje selo

 

            (L. Bebić)

Ivo nam se budi,

kao vjetar osvaja

On je tu

Sa nama

SA NAMAAAAAAA

 

(PONOVITI REFREN)

(preuzeto sa www.niktitanik.com)

McDONALDS PRIJAVA

Slovo This is an actual job application a 17 year old boy submitted at a McDonald's fast-food establishment in  Florida… And they hired him, because he was so honest and funny!

 

Name:

            Greg Bulmash

Sex:

            Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.

Desired position:

            Reclining. Ha ha. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.

Desired salary:

            $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.

Education:

            Yes.

Last position held:

            Target for middle-management hostility.

Salary:

            Less than I'm worth.

Most notable achievement:

            My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.

Reason for leaving:

            It sucked.

Hours available to work:

            Any.

Preferred hours:

            1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.

Do you have any special skills?:

            Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment.

ŠPIGL – DVOJNICI POZNATIH

"Kodakova" kamera  Stari frižider

Kamera & Frižider

May we contact your current employer?:

            If I had one, would I be here?

Have you ever been convicted of a felony?:

            Is "felony" sex with a cat? Because if it is… no.

Do you have any physical conditions that would prohibit you from lifting up to 50 LBS?:

            Of what?

Do you have a car?:

            I think the more appropriate question here would be "do you have a car that runs?"

Have you received any special awards or recognition?:

            I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearinghouse Sweepstakes.

Do you smoke?:

            Only when set on fire.

What would you like to be doing in five years?:

            Living in Bimini with a fabulously wealthy supermodel who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.

Do you certify that the above is true and complete to the best of your knowledge?:

            No, but I dare you to prove otherwise.

Sign here:

            Scorpio with Libra rising.

KAKO SAM UPOZNAO LjUBAV SVOG ŽIVOTA

Slowo Već dugo lajkujem jednu malu... Ima dugačke statuse, kratku pamet, čaroban profil i zgodnu sliku. Primetio  sam da ni ona nije ravnodušna. Vrlo često mi kaže kako voli moj dugački ... spisak prijatelja, ili kako mi je  dobar najnoviji link...

            I izašli smo par puta... Na Chat... Znate, to vam je ono mesto, desno od profil slike, prekoputa aplikacija... Moram priznati da sam bio oduševljen... Istina, pričamo različitim jezicima, ali ljubav ne poznaje barijere... Počeo

Rolerkoster
sam da učim... U početku su mi teško išli nepravilni glagoli BTW, WTF, OMG ... ali zato briljiram sa LOL, BWE i XEXE... Vremenom je i ona mene počela da lajkuje.... Jednom smo čak izašli i na MSN... Tamo je mirno i tiho i mogli smo pričati bez bojazni da nam neko gleda profile! Lepo nam je.... Izlazimo svako veče, družimo se, razmenjujemo slike i linkove... Iskren da budem, razmišljam o svadbi ... Zakupiću ceo Chat, svi ćete biti pozvani! Sviraće nam najbolji muzičari sa YouTube-a, a na meniju će biti samo specijaliteti i pikanterije: najsvežiji proizvodi sa Farmvilla i Fishvilla! Notifikaciju svog istorijskog "DA" ostaviću na statusu, neka svi vide da sam našao sreću u životu! I ona je obećala isto! Kupićemo divan stan u YouVillu, a ja ću dobiti dobar posao u Mafia Wars-u, pa ćemo imati od čega da živimo! Naši prijatelji dolaziće nam u goste redovno, a za njih ćemo otvoriti posebnu grupu, da imaju gde da se smeste. Mrzećemo sve koji nas hejtaju, alajkovati sve koji nas vole... Zajedno! Obećavam da ću joj biti veran, da neću lajkovati sličice drugih i da neću sa drugima izlaziti na Chat... Decu ćemo praviti u Photoshop-u i živeti srećno sve dok traje Facebook... ili dok nam ne ukinu profile!!

LOCIRAJTE SE

¤        Vi mora da ste iz Nove Engleske ako… (USA, poglavlje LXX)

3501. You find a snowmobile as a reasonable means of transportation for 4 months out of the year.
3502. You consider 65°F (18°C) ocean water "warm".
3503. Your car is parked outside because your snowmobiles get parked in the garage.
3504. "Vacation" means going anywhere south of New York City for the weekend.
3505. You've been to Cape Cod.
3506. $15 to park is a bargain.
3507. You can go from one side of your hometown to the other in less than 15 minutes and see atleast 15 losers you graduated with doing the exact same thing they were doing the last time you saw them.
3508. You've been to Six Flags New England.
3509. If you know that its not really "Six Flags New England"… but "Riverside".
3510. Everyone in town over 50 goes to Florida between October and April.
3511. You think Vermont has the best skiing in the World.
Slon

3512. You know what a bubbler is and you drink soda and pop someone in the face.
3513. You go to camp every year.
3514. The speed limit on the highway is 55mi/h - you're going 80, and everybody is passing you.
3515. You've ever gone candlepin bowling.
3516. You think 3 straight days of 90°F (32°C) weather is a heatwave.
3517. Your first motorized vehicle with four wheels was an ATV.

3518. You have ever put studded tires on your street racer.
3519. "Sox" vs. "Yankees" games are a life and death matter.
3520. There is a town green in the middle of your town.
3521. You refuse anything but real maple syrup.
3522. You regularly drive on roads that are as narrow and windy as a deer trail.
3523. You have ever missed school due to "Mud".
3524. You can choose exactly where your Senator sits on a political party map… Democrats on the Left, Republicans on the right… and that one little white dot in the middle is where our Senator sits.
3525. You ever have been asked in a school hallway if you have Duct Tape on you.
3526. You get pissed off when people assume New York is part of New England.
3527. You've skipped a day of school to go to the Big E, or… You've taken a field trip to the Big E
3528. A yellow light means "You can make it if you go a little faster"
3529. A red light/stop sign means stop… but only if you want to
3530. The first day after winter that's it sunny outside, you roll down all the windows of your car and pretend its summer, and even though its still 30°F (-1°C), you refuse to roll up your windows.

 

¤        Vi mora da ste iz Njujorka ako… (SAD, poglavlje LXXI)

Sat tetovaža
3531. You say "the city" and expect everyone to know that this means Manhattan.
3532. You have never been to the Statue of Liberty or the Empire State Building.
3533. You can get into a four-hour argument about how to get from Columbus Circle to Battery Park at 3:30 on the Friday before a long weekend, but can't find Wisconsin on a map.
3534. Hookers and the homeless are invisible.
3535. The subway makes sense.
3536. You believe that being able to swear at people in their own language makes you multi-lingual.
3537. You've considered stabbing someone just for saying "The Big Apple".
3538. The most frequently used part of your car is the horn.
3539. You call an 8"×10" plot of patchy grass a yard.
3540. You consider Westchester "upstate".

3541. You think Central Park is "nature".
3542.You see nothing odd about the speed of an auctioneer's speaking.
3543. You're paying $1,200 for a studio the size of a walk-in closet and you think it's a "steal".
3544. You've been to New Jersey twice and got hopelessly lost both times.
3545. You pay more each month to park your car than most people in the US pay in rent.
3546. You haven't seen more than twelve stars in the night sky since you went away to camp as a kid.

Klub 27

"Klub 27" je pojava da su neki poznati rok i bluz muzičari umrli u 27-oj godini. Iako ova slika, zbog Bibera, debelo zadire u crni humor, ipak je objavljujemo. Više o "Klubu 27": http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/27_Club

Friz

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