EN798 - Nedelja, 29. I 2023.
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1. Ukočenost 2. Jaukanje
pri saginjanju 3. Korišćenje
fraze "Kad sam ja bio mlad…" 4. Korišćenje
fraze "U moje vreme…" 5. Gubitak
kose 6.
Nepoznavanje muzičke top-liste 7. Pojačana
dlakavost na ušima i u nosu 8.
Izbegavanje kafića sa glasnom muzikom 9. Žaljenje
na bol u zglobovima 10.
Zaboravljanje tuđih imena 11. Biranje
odeće zbog udobnosti, a ne zbog izgleda 12. Da su svi na vodećim pozicijama jednostavno premladi 13. Spavanje pred TV-om. 15. Nerazumevanje mladalačke kulture 16. Nevešto rukovanje modernom
tehnologijom |
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17. Tehnološka neupućenost
18. Stalno prigovaranje i žaljenje
19. Nošenje naočara na lancu oko vrata
20. Nepoznavanje modernih brendova
21. Izbegavanje nošenja teških stvari
22. Stalno prigovaranje na televizijski program
23. Zaboravljate gde ste ostavili naočare,
torbu,
ključeve…
24. Gledanje ozbiljnih emisija
25. Spora vožnja
26. Biranje mirne večere kod kuće umesto
izlaska u grad
27. Zanimanje za antikvitete i buvljake
28. Spavanje nakon jedne čaše vina
29. Teško skidanje kilograma
30. Baštovanstvo
31. Ulaganje u antiejdžing kreme
32. Uživanje u slaganju puzla i rešavanju
ukrštenica
33. Oštar jezik u svakoj prilici iako to nije
uvek primereno
♈
Ovan
Suprotstavlja se nagonu da prevrne
sto kada konobar donese pogrešno jelo.
♉
BIK
"Ja ću uobičajeno"
♊
BLIZANCI
Ne mogu da se odluče, pa kažu
konobaru da ih "iznenadi jelom".
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♋
RAK
Skupi sve prljave tanjire i escajg kako bi pomogao
konobaru. ♌
LAV
Pokušava da sedne na čelo okruglog stola. ♍
DEVICA
Bilo bi mnogo ukusnije da su stavili manje origana. ♎
VAGA
(konobar se predstavi) "Ljudi, mislim da konobar flertuje
sa mnom!" ♏
ŠKORPIJA
Setno gleda u plamen sveće i razmišlja koga da zapali. |
♐
STRELAC
"Jeo sam istu ovakvu pastu kad
sam 3 nedelje živeo u Rimu."
♑
JARAC
Smišlja kako da podeli račun na 14
delova.
♒
VODOLIJA
Čuje da su gosti u restoranu
neprijatni prema konobaru i skače u njegovu odbranu.
♓
RIBE
"Mnogo mi se sviđa enterijer
ovog restorana!" (zaboravi da pogleda jelovnik)
The world is full of people with all
kinds of
character traits. We're all different, and there are several factors
that could
influence our lovely and sometimes not so personalities – perhaps you
won the
lottery and got your mom's wittiness, or maybe you mastered your
first-class
sarcasm skills during those challenging teenage years.
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In other words, you'll never know what sort of person you'll end up meeting on your way, and it's equally terrifying and exciting. Sometimes you get lucky and meet someone with very lovable qualities – but every so often, you might meet a person who will frankly make you question your entire existence.
This ex-teacher blessed the entire comment section on one
of Reddit's communities by sharing his odd yet somewhat amusing story.
A member of the group asked: "Who's the dumbest person you've ever
met?" – where the author revealed what it was like teaching a very
peculiar 9th grader. In the end, the comment received 17,8K upvotes and
remained the number one topic of the whole thread. (more info: Reddit)
Sure thing, teaching
little kids and young teens is exciting, and even rewarding. You
inspire them to reach their potential, whilst watching them grow and
turn into these great individuals with their |
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own unique mindsets. However, there are times when a student will make you have an existential crisis, and this story is just about that.
The
story took place in Virginia back in 2012, when the OP was on his last
year of
teaching. In fact, "Bored Panda"
managed to
reach out to the author and the man revealed that since then he changed
his
field and is now working in digital product management in Las Vegas, "where I get sunburnt to hell, eat a bunch,
and then try to walk it off hiking and climbing with my wife and two
dogs."
Ex-teacher shares a jaw-dropping story
about his rather unusual 9th grader
They might not understand how to
identify a noun or what theme is, but they somehow know how to make a
mean
plate of nachos. You learn pretty quick not to judge fish for their
tree
climbing ability, ya know.
I thought this was the rule when I
was teaching until I met Kevin. Kevin isn't his real name, but it
doesn't
matter because he can't spell it anyway.
Kevin was a student of mine during
my last year of teaching. He came to my classroom with very little to
show for
his academic past.
The OP
began his story by explaining how it's fairly normal for some students
to be a
little bit behind, and that usually the teachers and the school are
able to
release the kids' inner knowledge just by practicing and doing a bunch
of
activities. Besides, people that tutor folks know not to judge a book
by its
cover – however, in this instance, Kevin did manage to puzzle his whole
school.
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He had moved a few times and thus was missing a lot of typical test scores that we use to try and ballpark their ability. Don't worry, it was a ballpark… We didn't make major decisions until we actually had a chance to talk and work with a student for a bit.
I thought: "That's fine. I'll just do some one-on-one with
Kevin and see what's up." One on one with Kevin was like conversing
with someone who'd forgotten everything in a freak, if not impossible
amnesia incident.
There was no evidence that he had learned anything past
the 2nd grade… And now he was in 9th grade. Flabbergasted, I figured we
needed to get more serious with this. If he was going to be in my
class, I needed to know why and how.
The author proceeded to explain that Kevin had moved a
lot, which is why he missed a bunch of test scores that were typically
required when moving schools. Though, it wasn't a huge problem, and the
ex-teacher decided to just have a little chat with Kevin to see where
he was at academically.
Although, when the time came, things didn't go as smoothly
as the teacher would've wanted. The student seemed very lost, and even
led the author to think that he probably suffered from a serious case
of amnesia, as there were no other explanations.
I decidet to meet with him, his guidance
counselor, his parents, and another teacher to see what was really
going on. This is where it all became clear. |
It was by some incredible fluke that
his family hadn't been wiped off the face of the Earth years ago. Odds
are his
entire heritage was based ond blind luck and some type of sick divine
intervention that saves his family every time a threat presents itself.
Kevin was the genetic pinnacle of
this null achievement. Even my instructional lead, a woman who could
find a
redeeming trait in a Balrog, failed to see any reason this kid or his
family
should be alive today.
Kevin didn't seem to remember
anything past 2nd grade, which is when the author realized that he'd
have to
find a new way of tutoring the kid. The first thing that made sense was
to meet
with Kevin's family and counsellors to really understand why the
student was so
behind. Though, when the meeting was over, the man connected the dots
and
realized that the whole of Kevin's family has a similar character trait.
So here's a list of events that made it
abundantly clear that God exists and he's laughing uncontrollably:
- Kevin frequently
forgot when/where class was. On more than one occasion, I had to
retrieve him
from other classroms.
- Kevin ate an
entire 24 pack of crayons, puked and then did it again the next day.
This is
9th grade. I have no idea where he got crayons.
- Kevin's dad wrote
tuition checks and mailed them to me… his English teacher. This was a
public
school. When I gave it back to Kevin, voided, to give to his dad with a
brief
not explaining that this is a public school, Kevin got in trouble for
trying to
spend it 711 after school.
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Bored Panda asked the author to share what kind of
relationship Kevin had with his peers. To which the ex-teacher replied:
"He was a spectacle, and it turned into a bit of a feedback
loop… which ultimately is what I think sort of led to the whole thing
being what it ended up being. He'd do something dumb, so a classmate
would egg him on to do something else dumb, and then that'd beget yet
more dumb things. For instance, I'm fairly confident that a good half
of the stuff I wrote he did was because he got dared to or encouraged
to by a classmate." - Kevin
was removed from the culinary arts program after leaving a cutting
board on the gas stove and starting a fire… twice. -
Kevin threw his lunch at the School Resourse officer and tried to run
away. He ran into a door and insisted it wasn't him. - Kevin stole my phone during class. I called it. It rang. He denied that it was ringing. (Not that is wasn't his, not that he did it… No, he denied that the phone was actually ringing). He tried it three times before the end of the year. |
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After that, we wondered about
the most intriguing thing, which is where the student is now. The
author
revealed that he actually used to run into Kevin's mom around town from
time to
time. Though, the last thing the OP heard, which was sometime in the
middle of
2020, was that Kevin was, in fact, doing quite well.
Moreover,
he ended up having a kid with a classmate the year after he was the
OP's
student, and he believes that the reality of that sort of hit him like
a
"burlap bag full of books," because Kevin managed to shape up and
graduate on time.
- Kevin's mom could
never remember which school he went to. She missed several meetings
because she
drove to other schools (none of which he ever went to).
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- Kevin tazed
himself in the neck before a football game.
As well as that,
Kevin was working in some kind of leadership capacity in a fine dining
kitchen and pursuing an associates in business or something to that
effect. He got married and he, his wife, and their son own a home there
in town. The author also revealed that for all intents and purposes,
his beloved student did better than a lot of his classmates long term. -
Kevin say the N-word a lot. Kevin was white. The highschool was 84%
black. Kevin got beat up a lot. - Kevin didn't understand that his grade was dependent on tests, quizzes, homework, classwork, and participation. Kevin finished his first semester with a 3% average. He tried to bribe me with $11. - Kevin stole another student's Iphone… and tried to sell it back to them. |
- Kevin spit on a
girl and said: "You should get out of those wet clothes." The girl
was the Spanish student teacher.
- Kevin didn't know
dogs and cats were different animals.
- Kevin tried to
download porn onto a computer in the library… at the circulation desk…
while he
was logged on.
We also asked about Kevin's
relationship with school's staff and the OP said: "He was
one of a whole cadre of kids that were frequent flyers for
detention or an AP's office, so they were largely unimpressed. By
around
November or so, we'd given up on trying to figure out 'why' and were
mostly
trying to just figure out how to get him on some kind of track forward.
Unfortunately, he had classmates whose behavioral issues required a lot
more
attention."
- Kevin asked a
girl to prom (he was in 9th grade and freshmen don't go to prom) by
asking for
her phone number and then texting her his address.
- Kevin regularly
tried to cheat on assignments by knocking the pile over, grabbing one
before I
had picked them all up, and then writing it name on it wherever there
was room.
- Kevin had several
allergies, but neither his parents nor he could remember what they
were. They
were very concerned that "The holiday party" (it's high school – we
don't have those) would have peanuts. When they finally got a doctor's
note –
he was allergic to amoxicillin. (vrsta leka)
And
lastly, the author said that he's very delighted that Kevin's story has
a happy
ending, and that it's been great knowing how his story has been making
people
laugh for over 7 years.
Once
again, this proves how no one should ever judge a book by its cover,
even if
the book is all weird and hilarious at times. The fact that Kevin
managed to
achieve what the majority of his classmates couldn't is an incredibly
positive
outcome.
- Kevin and his parents
took a trip to Nassau (how the f*ck did they even get airline tickets?)
and
forgot all their luggage at home. I didn't believe him when he told me
until I
talked to his mom, who told me first thing when I saw her at the
bi-weekly
meeting.
- Kevin's grandfather
apparently passed away in a chainsaw accident. I can only assume God
was
looking the other way that day.
Life is full of surprises, and
even though the OP's precious student might've made his last teaching
year a
living hell – Kevin repaid everyone back by making god knows how many
people
laugh. What do you think about Kevin?
(preuzeto sa Bored Panda)
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