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Nedelja, 5. XII 2010.

Logo Leteći bumbar #352

U ovom broju donosimo:

1. In memoriam: Leslie Nielsen

            Omaž nedavno preminulom komičaru

2. Fejs-bruk!               Engleski jezik

            Smejurije sa Facebook-a

4. Palačinke

            8 činjenica o palačinkama

5. Oporuka                

            Poduži vic

6. Locirajte se!           Engleski jezik

            Vi mora da ste iz… ako je većina ovih tvrdnji tačna (Kolorado Springs, Konektikat; 2424-2460)

8. Širom neta

            Izveštaj sa izbora za Miss i mistera na sajtu "Domaći.de"

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In memoriam: Leslie Nielsen (1926-2010)

IN MEMORIAM: LESLIE NIELSEN (1926-2010)

FEJS-BRUK!

Slovo Pošto se svakog dana gomilaju raznorazne odvale sa društvene mreže "Facebook", na sajtu  http://failbook.com/ su počele da se pojavljuju slike sa istim. Predstavljamo vam najbolje odvale, a  njih ima jako puno pa je lakše da ih postavimo u tekstualnom obliku. Imena i slike profila su tamo zamaskirane, pa ćemo učesnike u komentarima predstavljati brojevima: [1][2][3] itd. Napomene će biti 

crvenom bojom.

 

Status: Kako su neki tipovi smešni. Raskinu sa devojkom preko poruke posle 4 meseca. Ne smeju u lice. Očaaaaj! Ne vraćam se takvim stokama! Mrš u kurac!

[2]: Tako je, [1]! Napuši mu se qrca! Debil! Očaj! Neverujem!

[3]: xaxaxaxaxa "Tako je, [1]! Napuši mu se qrca!" axaxaxa!

[4]: Hahahaha. "napuši mu se qurca"???

[5][2], pogledaj dobro šta si napisala

            [ FB ]

Status: Ulogira san se na Fejs preko digitrona. Aaaaaa prejebeno!!! Samo se nevide slike baš dobro.

[2]: Kaj? Kak to?

[1]: A lipo. Uzmi digitron u ruke pa ću ti reći.

[2]: Jel obični ili na kompu? Nekužim.

[1]: Obični.

[2]: Ok... jesam

[1]: Tipkaj 333 pa "puta"... 2 puta djeljeno 222... puta 33... puta 22... puta 666 puta dijeljeno 666 puta 55 i onda stisni "sin"

[2]: Kaj je "sin"?

[1]: Stisni ili Sin ili Cos ili AC

[2]: Ok... tnx

[1] (posle 17 minuta): Nije. Pokušat ću na nekom drugom sutra, sam' trebam ih naći... :P Valjda će mi uspjet.

            [ FB ]

Status: It's 1:00 time to skate!

[2]: It's bouta rain!
[3]: No, it's not gonna rain today. Tomorro it is.
Jaje na oko

[2]: You don't hear the thunder???

[2] (minut posle): LMAO! That was my surround sound on my TV... My bad xD

            [ FB ]

Status: ██████████ ogrebi mišem! Stavi ovo na zid 5 grupa ili strana ili u 5 komentara i kad to završiš ogrebi mišem ovo crno i pokazaće ti se ime onoga ko te voli!

[2]: Kako da ogrebem ovo? Odgovori brzoooo!

[3]: : ██████████ ogrebi mišem! Stavi ovo na zid 5 grupa ili strana ili u 5 komentara i kad to završiš ogrebi mišem ovo crno i pokazaće ti se ime onoga ko te voli!

[3]: Ma, da. Ne piše ništa.

[4]: Stavi ovo na zid od 5 grupa, ogrebi ovo mišem i sjebi monitor! Hahahahaha!

Mače apgrejd

            [ FB ]

Status: OMG! If you type your Facebook password in a comment box it comes up as stars! ********** hahaaaaaa!!! Awesome!!!

[2]: ******

[2]: That's awesome.

[3]: **********

[3]: Hahaha! Nice!!!

[4]: ilovefrodo69

            [ FB ]

Status: Finally home with the internet! :-) I'm so hungary!

[2]: Then have some Turkey and try not to get Greece on your shirt.
             [ FB ]

Status: What did I do over the summer? I climbed a mountain, broke a boat and made some new friends. Just the usual.

[2]: Well I broke a mountain, made new boat and climbed some friends.

            [ FB ]

Status: God is a DJ, life is a dancefloor, love is the rhythm, you are the music!!!

[2]: Who's the drunk guy who bothers everyone and eventualy gets trown out?

            [ FB ]

Status: Hung out with Buzz Aldrin

[2]: I bet he took you to the Moon. ;)

[3]: That toy story character? To infinity and beyyyyoooonnnnndddd!!!

            [ FB ]

Status: Everytime someone likes/comments this status – Michael [2] has to drink.

You, Trevor [3], Josh [4], Torie [5] and 49 others like this.

View all 34 comments

            [ FB ]

Status: ROCKTOBER!!!!!

[2]: Classical music? Bachtober.

[3]: Footwear? Socktober.

[1]: Work at Walmart? Smocktober.

[2]: Need security? Locktober.

[4]: Down at the monastery, it's frocktober.

[5]: Creepy tendencies? Stalktober.

[5]: Slow cooking? Crocktober.

[3]: Can't find your own style? Mocktober.

[1]: Need a place for your boat? Docktober.

[3]: Lucky for you, u, it's Cocktober. =))

[2]: Unfortunately, it is also blocktober.

[1]: I cant believe you guys would act this way!!! Shocktober.

            [ FB ]

Status: Dad: "[1], go clean your room"

Me: "Yes, dad"

/me walks in room and goes on facebook

[2]: Start cleaning or I'm telling!

[3]: Transmission is temporarely interupted by he who has unpluged the internet. (dad)

            [ FB ]

Status: I say we gather everyone with an IQ below 109 and have them fight it out to the death. That way by the year 2050, our collective brains wouldn't be the size of a walnut.

[2]: So, who is your first opponent?

            [ FB ]

Status: I keep katching the end of a news clip on the local Girl Scouts collecting something... Can anyone tell me what they are gathering?

[2]: Souls

            [ FB ]

Status: AUGH! There's a tornado and a flood warning in Utah.

[2]: Lucky! I want to see a tornado one day. Maybe even chase one.

[3]: I want to keep one for a pet.

[4]: Tornadoes aren't all that cool. The damage they cause is incredible. I was there the last tornado hit Utah and it destroyed a good portion of the town.

[2]: Well my pet one is going to be house trained.

            [ FB ]

Status: It's mommy week. Post this when you first became a mommy! July 18th 1987... Tiffany, my beautiful baby girl!!!

PALAČINKE

Sve važne činjenice o palačinkama na jednom mestu!

1. Palačinke su do jaja!
2. Najbolje su kevine palačinke.
3. Svako zna koliki mu je lični rekord u broju potamanjenih palačinki u jednom navratu, a mnogi aktivno rade i na obaranju tog rekorda.
4. Palačinke spadaju u grupu dvopolnih okruglih pljosnatih bića iz porodice Gurmania Slatkensis, mužjak se zove palačinak (množina palačinci), a ženka je palačinka (množina palačinke), mladunče još nije identifikovano, ali kad se nađe zvaće se palačinče.
5. Pravi majstori nikad ne koriste nož za prevrtanje palačinki, oni to čine naglim trzajem
tiganja - bace je uvis i ona se u vazduhu prevrne.
6. Prve palačinke se ne bacaju u vodu, već se u poluraspadnutom stanju trpaju u želudac (onog ko prvi naiđe, ili onog koji peče).
7. Čuvene su palačinke sa eurokremom, ali pravi sladokusci više vole one sa džemom ili sa pekmezom.
8. Palačinke su do jaja!

[2] (Tiffany): Thanks mommy (1986)

            [ FB ]

Status: Tell me a scary story.

[2]: Your mum and dad had sex and made you.

Džemper

            [ FB ]

[1]: If you could see my heart, what would you do?

[2]: Take you to the hospital

            [ FB ]

[1]: Next person that says anything I will hack your account!

[2]: That's illegal. lol And since you said it, I can just report you.

[3] (majka): Aren't you supposed to be taking the dog out?

[1]: U wanna bet?

[3]: No hacking! Take the dog out!

[2]: That's like the worse thing to say when your mom says "take the dog out"

[3]: If that dog is not outside in 2 minutes, I'm gonna turn on my web cam so your friends can watch me kick your ass!

[2]: ^ You made my day!

            [ FB ]

Status: in bed watching the news with a sleeping wife, baby, and a cat. Get any better?

[2]: Trade cat for a dog.

[3]: Then trade the dog for a pizza

[2]: And the baby for beers?

[3]: Then who would get the beers out of the fridge?

[2]: Wake up the wife?

[3]: So, to answer the question: yes, it can get better

            [ FB ]

Sa "Info" stranice profila:

Activities: Zanima Me Samo Moj Dečko and 24 more

            [ FB ]

Žika Jakšić: Zdravo Sale! Kako je na moru? Kada se vraćaš za Srbiju? Mi od 12. avgusta počinjemo sa snimanjima, nadam se da ćeš se do tada vratiti.

Saša Popović: Možeš me samo za kitu uvatiti. Ne vraćam se više. Ovde ladim jaja. Živim kao car. ;)

(prim. red.: nije poznato da li je to pravi profil ili fejkovan)

OPORUKA

Odelenje za reklamacije
 Z A P I S N I K

od 05. studenog 1986. god.

Sastavljen od Općinskog suda u Makarskoj

 

OD SUDA PRISUTNI:

...

 

P r i j e p i s

 

O P O R U K A

 

ojom ja, nižepotpisana Andrijašević Tereža pok. Ante iz Krvavice, Krvavica BB, rođena u Krvavicama 19. februara 1937. godine, potpuno sposobna za rasuđivanje i po svojoj slobodnoj volji raspolažen svojun imovinon za slučaj smrti i to kako slidi:

 

1. Svojin nasljednicima na mojoj cilokupnoj imovini određujen muža Vinka Andrijašević pok. Ive iz Krvavice, Krvavica BB, sina Mirka Andrijašević iz Krvavice, Krvavica BB i ćer Katicu Rožić rođ. Andrijašević iz Krvavice, Bratuš BB, osim na pokretnoj imovini pod točkun 2. i 3. ove oporuke.

 

2. Postelju, iz desne sobe na drugon katu kuće, ostavljan susidu Anti Beroš pok. Mate iz Krvavice, Krvavica BB, kao znak zahvalnosti jer me na njoj "dobro upira".

 3. Ričine sa crnin biseron iz bileg škafetina u radnoj sobi, ostavljan susidi Kati Beroš rođ. Kujundžić, ženi Ante iz Krvavice, Krvavica BB, kako bi došla na sud i vidila točku 2. ove oporuke.

Kauč kolač

 

            Ovu san oporuku napisala svojun desnon rukon i vlastoručno je potpisujen.

18. X. 1985.

Andrijašević Tereža v.r.

 

LOCIRAJTE SE

Nepismeni dabar

¤        Vi mora da ste iz Kolorado Springsa ako… (USA, SD CO, poglavlje XLV)
2424. You've never thought twice about why Focus on the Family has its own highway sign.
2425. You still talk about the Ted Haggard scandal.
2426. You tried to be cool by hanging out at Pikes Perk and Coffee Roasters.
2427. You did all your Christmas shopping at Entertainmart but are ashamed to tell anyone.
2428. You know who lives in the Broadmoor area.
2429. You buy weed from a kid… Who lives in Widefield.
2430. You've been pulled over on Powers.

¤        Vi mora da ste iz Konektikata ako… (SAD, poglavlje XLVI)

2431. You think everyone drives like an asshole except you, especially when you see a NY license plate on the other car
2432. You actually think your school is badass because there are druge

2433. You doooo have an accent. Dont think so? Read this sentence aloud… Did you pronounce the "t" in "don't"? Do you pronounce Connecticut with a "t", or do you say "connedicut"… Exactly…

2434. When opening a new dunkin' donuts is the talk of the town for 2 years because its actually within driving distance

2435. It's not uncommon to have your house completely veiled by smoke from the neighbors woodstove
2436. The center of town is the only excisting traffic light.
2437. The local attraction is the liquor store.
2438. You are part of the CT stereotype and spend your days looking through your huge window in your mansion onto your ginormous lawn and ride your horse inbetween golf sessions

2439. You are not surrounded by hicks, but "thugs". yea, you're street, or at least you like to think you are
2440. Rusted cars, dented cars, cars with broken headlights, cars with loud mufflers, cars that rattle and make you think death is coming - are all commonplace
2441. You get dressed up to go to the movies cuz its the only thing to do, hey…for us its venturing out on the town

2442. You know exactly where the only six places to cross the CT river are- 'cause damn the lack of bridges is annoying…

Širom neta

 

Slovo Obaveštavamo vas da se ove godine neće održati

 izbori za titule Miss i Mistera sajta "Domaći.de"

 pošto se prijavilo manje od propisanog broja učesnika, u obe kategorije.

Redakcija rubrike "Širom neta"

2443. When you have to drive at least half an hour to get a quart of milk that doesn't come straight from a cow.

2444. When the new Walmart opens and it is the talk of the town for at least a month.

2445. You realize that knowing the first and last names of every single one of your class mates, in addition to their full life story, is not normal.
2446. You are genuinely shocked when you find out that in other high schools girls actually get pregnant.

2447. You dont actually live on a farm, but in a huge estate
2448. We get cooked…not smashed, blasted, plastered…but cocked
2449. Summer social highlights involve carnivals and county fairs
2450. You know members of the FFA
2451. You're school has an AG department
Mače u patikama

2452. You know of at least one local pot farm

2453. It's not uncommon to see signs like "Turtle xing", "Horse xing" or "Tractor xing"
2454. You have actually seen all the stars at night
2455. You find the sound of crickets in august "soothing"
2456. Coyotes keep you up at night, or cows mooing do
2457. Sneaking out requires a mode of transportation away from the woods… Or meadows… Or protection from coyotes
2458. Summer highlight = keg parties
2459. You have hiked up a big hill or small mountain at least once for a keg party.
2460. At least one of your friends has a sick house right on the water

Blic strip; Autor: Marko Somborac

Friz

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